Joyful attack

When I commenced my role at Liberty Christian Ministries (and even before when I shared my testimony on TV and other places), the spiritual attack against me was considerable.  It still is.  A number of so-called ‘gay Christians’ and faux ‘brothers’ and ‘sisters’ have found this blog in the last couple of days, and already the attacks are underway.  It is not really a surprise: anyone who puts their head above a parapet will have the odd bullet coming their way.

My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience – James 1:2-3

I have been called all sorts of things in this work: narrow-minded, bigoted, judgemental, offensive, anti-social, and outrageous (and that’s excluding all the more aggressively worded epithets).  Strangers have been coming to this blog and sending outrageous comments of their own, picking up on the most innocuous comments here and turning them into petty insults in order to undermine me.  Thankfully they never got to publication, as I have been vetting them!  They do tend to be discouraging, but God has been showing me a number of things about the people doing this:

1) The anger directed at me is ultimately not about me.  I’m the target, but it is not me whom they are really angry at.  They are angry at someone who has wounded them, possibly at the hands of a pastor or someone bearing the name of Jesus, and they- seeing me as someone bearing the name of Jesus- want to offload their aggression onto me.  If anything, I pity them for that.  What they’re doing to me is only going to entrap them in their bitterness and make it more entrenched, but it is them (and not I) who is angry;

2) The people angry with me need forgiveness.  They are blinded by the prince of the air and are under a delusion, and while they are not passive victims of that and are responsible for doing something about it, they are under the influence of Satan.  After all (Eph. 6:10-20), the real Enemy in the world is Satan, not the people whom he is using.  Those souls who are attacking me need release from those demonic influences and to be immersed with the grace of the Lord Jesus;

3) These trials God is using to build my character, as He promises in James 1:2-3.  When an athlete builds his muscles in preparation for an event, he needs resistance to develop his strength.  God has two sources of resistance for spiritual development: temptation and trial.  Those He uses as opportunities to work through pain, draw closer to Him, and for blessing;

4) It humbles me.  I too have the choice ever before me to renounce my faith, and I almost did in order to embrace a ‘gay Christian’ theology.  It would have given me a convenient get-out-of-gaol free card, a blank cheque to live however I wanted to, but it wouldn’t have saved me.  I too used to project my anger onto people, former pastors and church people, but in the end it hurt me much more than it hurt them.  Bottom line is, I understand aggressive people who lash out because that was me and sometimes I still see it in myself at times. But I know what grace is like, and I pray that my enemies come to know it too.

***

Dear Heavenly Daddy,

There are so many broken people in this world who need You, but they are kept from coming to You by their wounds, their aggression, and a spiritual blindness.  It is so sad, and I know what it is like to be in a place like that.  You love those who are even Your enemies, because You save enemies as You said in Romans 5:6-8!  Please, Daddy, forgive and bless those who hate me and who hate Your word.  Help me not to retaliate and hit back, but to speak truth in love.  For those who find themselves at odds with Your word of hope and redemption, I ask that You bless and keep them; to make Your face shine upon them, and be gracious to them.  Please lift up Your countenance upon them, and give them Shalom instead of fear, hate, immorality, and disobedience.  This I pray in the Name and Authority of Jesus Christ, Amen.